Suspended in the workplace.

I kinda don't feel like talking to anyone for some reason. Strangely enough I blame work. I dread going to that place every single day, so, I'm looking for ways to get out and I found this, it's a home based business I'm trying out if I make money on it you'll never see me come back to work, I'll just be gone and no one will know where I went. Now I don't hate work I just hate bullshit, I hate being a busser, I hate shaving every damn day, I hate working 40+ hours a week and having no time to myself, I hate the way things are there just to have enough to barely survive in this world. However, our General Manager there is a really great person though I do like Marvin a lot and how he's been there for as long as he has I'll never know that is one man I would worship if he asked me to. But I kinda miss being a dishwasher, nobody said shit to me, I was workin with my brother and we talked about video games, electronics, and other things all day and I had nobody tell me to quit talking, and I never had to shave most of all! Oh god and the split shifts jesus christ I hate the split shifts anymore, that's what takes up more time than working a straight 8 hours shift because I work a 4 hour shift go home for about an hour or two then I have to come back early cus I know I need to be there early and work another 4 to 5 hour shift, so pretty much it's like working 12 hours straight, I hated it no wonder no one likes split shifts. gah!

So I got suspended from work til Tuesday for being myself, for not being able to come in to work when it's pouring rain outside with thunder and lightning and I don't have a car and no one was at home to take me to work and I call in saying I'm not gonna be able to make it to work unless they want me to come in soaking wet from walking to work, so I got my second strike for it. I don't really care honestly I'm glad I have time off to finally think to myself and what I'm doing with my life and where I'm going instead of worring about "Can I get up in the morning to get to work, am I shaved, and are my clothes clean? Fuck!! I don't care. i really really don't. Don't get me wrong I don't wear dirty clothes, i do shave every once in a while when I didn't have to worry about it but in the last 7 months I've been working in the Tavern and had to worry about that constantly I hate it, I god damn hate it!!! To the point to where I didn't care anymore. I honestly didn't care about what anyone thought of me, I walked out of the main dining room office and everyone asked "What happened!?" I didn't say shit I just kept walking with my head held high. I swear the death of me is gonna be from bullshit not smoking, not cancer, not a freak accident from bullshit. Okay I'm over exaggrating there but I swear I feel as if something needed to change and finally I had the balls to change it and it was the best thing for me. I finally feel happy, it's such a relief knowing I feel happy it's because I finally feel free for a short time of being suspended. :D

When I watch the movie Office Space I can totally relate to Peter (Ron Livingston) when he says, "I did nothing. I did nothing and it was everything I thought it could be." I love that quote! :) That's how I feel.